What Love Means to Me

The cold makes me shiver
The knot in my stomach forms
Memories of loneliness rush back
My parents fighting in the next room
Both of them screaming
Every night I couldn't sleep
I lay helpless and wait
And it's another day of pretend
Things are okay
The tears dry up by morning

The road for you is harder
You've got more to prove
But it is simply this
Show me you want my love
This is what love means to me
Anything's better than
The crappy love in my head
If you listen to my plea
Move me with your efforts
This is what love means to me

Things do not seem different now
I say I want or don't want this
Yet I get discarded as silly
At work I fix everything
But in love, I may be stupid
I know the knot is back
And I lay helpless and wait
It is cold and I shiver
I know only of love broken
But I thought I deserve better

The road for you is harder
You've got more to prove
But it is simply this
Show me you want my love
This is what love means to me
Anything's better than
The crappy love in my head
If you listen to my plea
Move me with your efforts
This is what love means to me

Then why am I not getting it?
I am here hurting
But I only feel your disregard
I don't want to be alone
But I feel like I am
This love brings me back
To a scary familiar place
I don't want to feel helpless
Get it together cuz I'm cold
Fix the love that I know.

The road for you is harder
You've got more to prove
But it is simply this
Show me you want my love
This is what love means to me
Anything's better than
The crappy love in my head
If you listen to my plea
Move me with your efforts
This is what love means to me

Lying Back

I still have nights when the pills stop working
I still have dreams of you making me cry
I lie awake in bed and then it all hits me
I was deceived and I was not loved

Love should start from oneself to another
Love should not be shared
Love should have no barriers
Love should not drive you insane

I knew you were hiding things when you asked to disconnect
I knew I was a convenient excuse when you didn't have your other
I knew I should have stopped loving a long time ago
I knew I had to lie back cuz you hurt me so

I lied I slept with another woman as you kept me a secret from yours
I saw that you had flown to Canada when you said doctor's orders says no
I don't know now where the truth ended and lies began
I just see one big hoax about a virtual love that will all be what it is

Whether you truly had the worst case of SLE or cut your thigh cuz of me
Whether you meant the words you loved me even while you were dying
They all become meaningless after all the pain we caused each other
The poison can make it go away, the mind will soar and one day forget.

Never the Same

I open my eyes, I'm not dreaming
I see before me green emeralds
I feel the warmth of your arms
I couldn't ask for anything more.

You torment my soul,
You render me paralyzed,
You bend me till I'm yours,
You have captured my being.

People expect complications
But they will see no layers
You see layers I'm good at hiding
Yet you love me like you're clueless.

You torment my soul,
You render me paralyzed,
You bend me till I'm yours,
You have captured my being.

I may deny you my forever
And you may find love elsewhere
But for one fleeting moment
I was yours and you were mine.

You torment my soul,
You render me paralyzed,
You bend me till I'm yours,
You have captured my being.

Your tenderness I often long
If only it's readily available
But I am thankful I've felt it
Now, I'm never the same.

You torment my soul,
You render me paralyzed,
You bend me till I'm yours,
You have captured my being.

Best to Stay Mum on Pro-Choice for Rape Victims

If a girl got pregnant because of rape, and wants nothing to do with what grows inside her, it is her choice. Until there is some scientific procedure to take a fertilized ovum out of her uterus and be allowed to put the same in someone else who wants to conceive (or say ANY woman that fate picks who is a pro-life advocate), then the victim has every right to rid herself of this memory the best way she knows how. If the victim would not want to endure any more pain through pregnancy and childbirth, it is her choice. It is a complicated situation, one where there is no right or wrong. It is not just about the child's dignity and right to live -- because the victim has also been stripped off her dignity and will have to deal with this trauma for a lifetime (in essence, stripping her of a right to live). If we see it from her point of view, it should not be a sign of weakness, but of strength. Not a sign of defeat, but of overcoming misfortunes. Not a sign of staying as a victim, but of having courage to face an unknown future. Not a sign of acceptance, but of doing her best given her circumstance. No one whether from the left or right, whether a God-believer or a pagan, who has not walked the same path need judge.

North Atlantic Divide

The thousand miles between us
The times when we met in space
The dream of being together
The promise of great patience

This is no ordinary circumstance
But we grab it with both hands
Cuz there's a reason we connected
Despite this North Atlantic Divide

Some days seem way too long
Some parallel world we could exist
Some cynics call us fools
Some romantics watch in awe

This is no ordinary circumstance
But we grab it with both hands
Cuz there's a reason we connected
Despite this North Atlantic Divide

We may have no ending to this piece
We just make it day by day
We will let this love take its course
We can learn to make an adult choice

This is no ordinary circumstance
But we grab it with both hands
Cuz there's a reason we connected
Despite this North Atlantic Divide

Now that we've seen a possibility
Now we can be fully aware
Now there's sweetness on our lips
Now we can just take it all in

This is no ordinary circumstance
But we grab it with both hands
Cuz there's a reason we connected
Despite this North Atlantic Divide

Forever and a Day

When I think of you, my heart beats uneven
Your love takes me on a wonderful journey
Like today is brand new, and we're making history
Where love lasts forever and a day.

I'll stay even when the end seems close
I'll love you, and will never leave your side
I'll close my eyes, and dream of you
I'll hold you tight until it's time for you to go.

I'm yours even when no one's looking
In your embrace is where I find my joy
Beside you I choose every night and day
My heart beats for you alone.

I don't wanna go anywhere without you
My heart will never get tired
I'm here for you even when times get tough
Come here, my arms are wide open.

I'll love you even through scary times
I won't let this lifetime go to waste
We'll face tomorrow stronger together
I choose to love you forever and a day

When You're Ready

I see you in my head
Even there I see depth
We talk about everything
Just wanna capture every phrase
As I get lost in your gaze
How your beauty resonates

I'll kiss you every waking moment
I'll hold you all through the night
I'll hope all good things for you
I'll listen to your bustling thoughts
I'll show you love has no walls nor fears
I'll make it worth the wait

Sitting on my bed
Many thoughts swim
To take you in my arms
And touch you right
This is what you want
You are free to be

I'll kiss you every waking moment
I'll hold you all through the night
I'll hope all good things for you
I'll listen to your bustling thoughts
I'll show you love has no walls nor fears
I'll make it worth the wait

We only live once
So let's make it all happen
Sometimes we mess up
Or others make it hard
Just look closer at another
We're never alone

I'll kiss you every waking moment
I'll hold you all through the night
I'll hope all good things for you
I'll listen to your bustling thoughts
I'll show you love has no walls nor fears
I'll make it worth the wait

But I respect your circumstance
So take your time
It will come in due time
I will wait
When you're ready
Till you wanna be mine

I'll kiss you every waking moment
I'll hold you all through the night
I'll hope all good things for you
I'll listen to your bustling thoughts
I'll show you love has no walls nor fears
I'll make it worth the wait