A Slave No Longer

I was too afraid of losing his love.
I met him the first time I attended church.
Being in a new country, I adjusted with him in the picture.
Naturally I knew not how to be separate from him
Because I never did things on my own.

I lost my sense of independence.
I planned my time according to his free time.
I waited for his regular phone call at certain times of the day.
I thought of him whenever I got the chance.
I willed whatever he willed for me.

I made him my world.
I lost myself to sin with him.
I stopped seeing my spiritual director.
I accepted his lies for fear of being alone.
I was more afraid of not being in familiar ground.

I lost the joy I used to possess coming to this land.
This was going to be the second time of admitting.
I made a mistake once again in choosing my partner.
I realized I was not afraid of losing him.
Even when I knew he was no longer the person I loved.

It has been a full month of non-communication.
I have decided to allow God to free me from that baggage.
I keep busy if only to get preoccupied.
I only cry about it a little before God now.
He is the only one who cares to listen.

God has long revealed it many times.
No one deserves that kind of treatment.
My healing is now His business.
I am a better person without him.
The truth has set me free.

"If you remain in my word, you will truly be my disciples,
and you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free." - Jn 8: 31-32